The Internet of Cooking

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If cooking is art then Mother is my favorite artist.

Every dish that her magical hands whipped up acquired an ethereal grace that transcended even our gluttonous ways to appear beautiful.

When I left home, armed with a book detailing Mother’s recipes that could put Era Longhi’s grocery list to shame, I assumed that Mother’s genes and the precious book were all that I needed to whip up a perfect meal.

Within three days of my cooking expedition, the smoke alarm cheered on my efforts – not once but thrice. The same recipe yielded a fresh new dish every time – the only constant was the burnt brown color.

Years of trials ( or blunders) and my not-so-smart kitchen have strengthened both my cooking abilities as well as the husband’s digestive system.

In the kitchen of the future, cooking woes will go as far as toggling between applications on your phone that manage your smart kitchen appliances making it appear as if the Autobots and the Decepticons have ‘transformed’ their ways to whip up the perfect meal while you kick up your feet after a long day.

The camera in the oven will beam you live videos of the food that is cooking.

Your smart pan screams a warning if you have added more salt than recommended causing your hungry stomach to roll in panic but will soon uplift your spirits complimenting you with a “Marvelous” after you have flipped the pancake just right.

The smart refrigerator warns you about the expiring food inside it listing recipes conforming to your taste for the usage of the same.

As if all this is not spooky enough, experts are now working on aiding communication between these smart appliances.

If cooking is aimed higher than a boiling an egg then it is best recommended that kitchen novices work on strengthening their toggling skills for the shortest way to your partner’s heart is just a smart kitchen away!

50 responses »

  1. Ha ha. 😂 My mom’s my favourite artist too. And me, well, I’ve never entered the kitchen for anything except baking or stealing pappadams while Amma’s making them. 😂 Ini ithum koode smart aakenda kurave ollu. Well written, my dear. ❤😊

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    • I was just like you before I left home, only that I assumed that learning the art of cooking involved seeing your mother cook while you went to steal the pappadams. Unfortunately, I learnt it the hard way. Pedikyenda, with the smart kitchen, all you have to do is learn to flip your fish or dosa or check if it is the right consistency and may be even steal pappadams from your own smart kitchen if you miss doing that, rest will be taken care of by the smart appliances.
      Haha, ellam smart avunnu alley. I hope it will not ‘transform’ us into dumb. (Missing Emoji)
      Thank you, Shweta. Appol Sunday addipoli alley, so many milestones and achievement in the blog front. Treat veenum ketto. (again missing Emoji)

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      • Yeah devices smart aakumbol, humans lazy and dumb aakan oru valya probability ond. Yeah! It’s been a great week. Ellaam koode orumich vannu. 😁😁😁 Of course, come to Trivandrum. Appo njan valya treat arrange cheyyaam. 😉😀

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      • Actually I have been thinking that smart gadgets are a product of our own brains and thinking, so how can that be smart and we be dumb ? Silly alley, well most of these things are.
        Trivandrum, Oh it has been a dream. The Padmanaabhaswamy kshethram is a dream. Enikyu athu kaananum ennu ullathu velliyooru swapnamaanu but unfortunately, Palakkad vittittu evediyum poyitilla, max Guruvayoor in Trissur. Sad alley? But I will too one day. Annu njan vannu ‘valleyooru’ treat medichoolam 😉

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      • Haha devices smart aakumbol, humans have an increasing tendency to be numb. 😂😂😂😂
        Ohhh, when I was small, we used to go there every week. Njangalum ella varshavum Guruvayoor pokarondayirunnu. Ingott varumbol enne ariyikku. Njan ivide ondenkil, Padmanabha swamy kshethrathil kond pokaam. 😃😃😃 Saaramilla, time kidakkuke alle. One day you’ll be able to realize that dream of yours. 😘❤

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  2. I would place the following in the order to have your as well as your family’s taste buds stand up and salute you.(1) genes (2) inclination (3)dedication (4) perseverance despite brickbats (5) ability to smile at complements as if tpo say, ‘ah, that’s all in my blood!

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  3. Hahaha! Such a funny post 😂😂 the fact that in times to come we’d have appliances that communicate would drive me insane. Omg, I so recognise myself with the post and the part of smoke alarm cheering you😂😂 you’re amazing.
    The chaos in the kitchen! Hahahaha. Have a great day my dear friend. 😄😄😄😄

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    • Hello, TW. How are you my dear. So so glad I made you laugh. Actually, the events that conspired when the smoke alarm cheered me was anything but funny. I mean it was an evening and the husband came home to a house filled with smoke. However in hindsight it still leaves me laughing. I have also not mentioned our many friends who have survived my many cooking blunders when they came home and stayed back for dinner or lunch.
      Thank you so very much,TW. Where are new posts, new poems or another story from the past. I dint see any update in your space. Will check anyway.
      Good day my dear.

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      • Hello ☺😊 I’m all good. It’s starting to get a bit chilly down here, how’s the weather there? Yeah dear friend I’ve been keeping a little busy, have not been able to pen down anything for my WP. Will do soon.
        How are you?
        Lol, believe me I have all my sympathies for your cooking accidents especially because lol I’m funny myself in the kitchen. They are dangerous also, so please take care.
        What’s your fav dish by the way? Have a nice cosy sunday to you and your family😄😄❤

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      • Glad to know that is all is well, TW 🙂
        My favorite dishes will be Dosa with chutney, both of which have been cooked by my dear Mother. Sounds silly I know, but what ever she touches just turns into gold and her crispy golden dosas do not escape that golden rule. 🙂
        You too my dear! What would your fav dish be?

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      • Ah your mother’s recipe of dosa is making me hungry for some now 😦 I’m sure they are fabulous in taste, has to be ❤ and no, I get it. I feel the same way about my mom and my sister’s cooking. I think may be my friend they’re all awesome cooks and lol you know where I stand in cooking so yeah😂😂 Plus there’s love and feelings they pour into their preparations.
        I can’t get enough of North Indian dishes like Rajma Chawal, Dal Makhni, Paneer Butter Masala etc, then there’s Pizza, pasta, Chinese food, South Indian and sweets (I’ll run out of space writing about my love for food especially sweets😂😂)

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      • My God you seem to be just like me… dosa, btw, was just one of my favorites in the endless list. I love them all… Northie, Southie, quick fixes, junk, chocolates, sweets …. it’s endless. See our tastes Mach there too😍!
        I was in your shoes then… before I had my own kitchen.. only that I assumed walking into a kitchen while my mother cooked was enough to understand the art of cooking. We all learn… and when the need comes.. you will too.. after all, like me, you are a good lover too with a hungry stomach.😍😊😇

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      • Yayie. Thank you for giving out positivity ❤ and I don’t know how but somehow WP is acquainting me with people who are very much like me, it’s quite a happy feeling 😄😄 and so glad to find out our food tastes match too❤❤😄😄🙌🙌

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      • They say that if you choose the world conspires to make sure that you meet the right and like-minded people. It is a sure pleasure to have weekly virtual conversations with you my friend. (count hearts and :);))

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  4. I’m still reeling from the giant billboard in London that is made up of hundreds of tiny cameras with face recognition software so when we walk by, the advertisements that pop up will be geared to all our moves on the various social media platforms we play with! Your post is a reminder that we are moving at warp speed into a future that once was only seen in the movies – thank goodness, my Mom still sends me home from my visits with her delicious homemade soup made with her own artistic hands!

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  5. Nailed it lol ! Although I have to admit that it did raise my anxiety levels thinking about the future. (face palm)

    To add to this, Most of the companies are selling their appliances by using the term “Smart” just to lure consumers with their product. But what does this “smart” mean? Is the meaning same for both the manufacturers and the consumers? For example, smart refrigerators notify the users when they left the door open, if this refrigerator is smart then why it does not close the door by itself? Just asking 😉

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    • 😉 Smart question, Neal. Need to put it across to the ‘smart’ companies that make these ‘smart’ gadgets, otherwise we would qualify as ‘dumb’ customers who have fallen to their ‘smart’ tricks 😉

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  6. There’s a market for anything and everything these days. But I too prefer a dumb kitchen, like you said, which allows us to make mistakes and learn from them.
    Pranitha, you are an artist par excellence. You arrange the words so beautifully, it makes such a wonderful read . Well done 👍

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    • Thank you, Deepika.. your words have brought a big big smile to my face and warms my heart, truly😍
      My dumb kitchen has given up on me at times with shrieking fire alarms and experiments gone bad but I will still be faithful to it, like you, and keep the new kitchen innovations for the future!

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  7. Ha ha…enjoyed this post. Brought back memories of my early kitchen days. Not a kitchen Goddess even now, so wouldn’t really mind if I had appliances which told me the salt is short. Any help from any quarter would be welcome😊

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